My Royal Mom

May flowers bring me lots of memories.  I lost my mom 12 years ago today.  So many of us have lost our parents, and it's the way nature intended, them to leave before their children do.  It's still hard.  Every day that I think of her or recall a childhood memory, I wish I had her to phone and share.  After my Daddy died in 2014, I felt very alone for the first time ever, really.  An orphan, as someone heartlessly reminded me after his death.  My guiding stars were extinguished. 

May is Mother's Day, which doesn't make me sad to have lost mine because I have two children who make me who I am to them: Momma.  I don't put that on my facebook profile however, or list it first in my twitter bio, because as Mom always reminded me, I am way more than just that.  Being a mom is one of my most important roles, but it's not that simple.  We mothers have a zillion more facets than that.  I love thinking about my mom around Mother's Day.  I always plant lavender, because it was one of her favorites and it blooms around now.  Just a stroke of the blossoms with my hand evokes thoughts of my momma. 

May is also Royal Wedding month!  When your family is Canadian and subjects of the Queen, well, ya just adore a royal wedding.  When Wills and Kate got married (yes, we're that close we call them by their nicknames), Cameron and I got up at 0430 to have tea ready and watch the ceremony, just to install that memory into forever.  And we'll do it again 19th May this month for Harry and Meghan.  My beloved went to the UK for business last week and thoughtfully brought me a coffee mug celebrating the royal wedding, knowing both my mother and I would love it.  Momma had china representing all the weddings she lived through, refusing to retire the Charles and Diana (Chuck and Di to we familiar) plates even after Camilla entered the picture.  When Momma died, I couldn't keep it all (because minimalist), but I presented her precious heirlooms to her Daughters of the British Empire sisters who were thrilled to care for them. 

I hate that my children didn't know my mom as well as I wish they had.  But I tell them whenever the opportunity arises, "Nana would have said..." or "when I was a kid _____."  When we go to the family cabin in the summer every year, memories of my parents are in every whistle through the trees and every wave in the lake.   It is there, I can always see my guiding stars, bright in the northern sky. 

Happy Almost Mother's Day and Happy Wedding Harry & Meghan!