Having versus Doing: Just Be There!

Lately, I have been pondering the psychology behind WHY we want to keep stuff.  Why does GETting things seems more desirable than DOing things?  What is hard to let go, give away, and live simply?  There's not a clear cut answer to that query. We all have our own story.  For example, my father-in-law grew up in the Depression, therefore possessions mark a sign of prosperity and abundance, and hellfire we ain't giving that up!  Not even the pool cover that hasn't seen a drop of chlorinated water since 1985. No sir!

For some of us with childhoods where our toy rations were meager, or our clothing elicited sneers and disdain from the popular crowd, the ability to buy what we wanted, even on credit, was a wicked temptress.  A closet full of seasons of outfits gives us a satisfaction soaked  "so there!"  But does that satisfaction last?  No. It does not. 

Because there is always someone who has more or better, and honestly, this is just our PERCEPTION of what is out there. A race we cannot ever win. The participants are innumerable and unidentifiable. Quit the race. Strive for something else to drench you in personal satisfaction. 

What should I strive for, you ask?  In two words -- mindfulness and experience.  Now these very nebulous and seemingly out of reach nouns may have many meanings to you. They differ for each of us.  But let me offer up an example for your consumption. 

This weekend we went to see our college boy in his college town to watch college basketball. The combination of those three college things is a formula for joy. Notice no material items have wandered into the picture. We stayed in my favorite boutique hotel, which I guess has "stuff" in it, but I look at that as more of a museum visit. Admire, maybe take ONE of their high-end brand hand lotions home, and depart. 

We got to witness two great things: one, our boy in a sea of excitement with thousands of other students. Watching a sport he loves to play and is knowledgable about, combined with the collective euphoria of a crowd experiencing a hard fought victory. Second, our alma mater on national television beating a historically awesome basketball powerhouse.  High fiving people you don't know. The deafening chants that cause vocal strain in all 12,000 spectators. I challenge you, if you haven't experience that kind of group fervor and thrill, to find it. Somewhere. 

It may not be a sporting event. It may be at a Broadway show where the ovation at the end brings unforseen emotion. It may be a graduation ceremony where the struggles to finish evaporate as the success washes in like a roaring tide. Regardless of setting, it is an experience. It is a feeling. You won't forget it. You'll recount the story to yourself and others again and again; the story always gets better with age anyway. And that story takes up no space. Except in your heart and mind, and that space is infinite. 

That day, reveling in victory and the smug happiness that we were THERE, made mindfulness a clearer picture to me. I didn't worry about facebook, what anyone else was doing (other than making sure college boy's girlfriend knew where he was sitting in the crowd to catch him on TV), or what would happen next week at work. All that was going on was right now: a great game, my family close by, and a memory bank deposit. Clothing, our car brand, or the size of our house were all immaterial. How freeing. 

This week, plan to make a memory bank deposit. And pack up your bags for 40 Bags in 40 Days. How is that progressing for you?  Remember, a drawer counts!  One cabinet where you eliminate the 50 plastic storage containers with/without lids is a success!  I guarantee you that a storage container will never give you comraderie, euphoria or mindfulness. Ever. 

Happy experiences to you this week!  Embrace the joy, not the crap.